Friday 16 December 2011

WARNING CONTAINS STRONG ELEMENTS OF FICTION

Nativity scenes should have a discreet written warning: "Caution, contains strong elements of fiction. Always consult Doctor Price before drinking from the well of fantasy. Symptoms of poisoning include unwarranted anxiety & euphoria, if not they, then those around them may experience nausea. Antidote : ' The reason driven life '
Old Father Pricemas puts the fun back into Christmas by taking the sting out of its tale. Give your loved ones a cracker of a Xmas by giving the gift of the priceless,' Reason driven life', which will make life go with a bang and fit us all for heaven, if there's one there. TRDL -only $17.45-a down to earth price for heaven on earth.

I'll be laughing on the other side of my face if Christ comes through the clouds on his sleigh with a heigh ho, heigh ho, it's back to work we go. Heigh maybe he will come down my chimney, but he might look like a white & black minstrel. Probably his robes are non stick & self cleaning though. Maybe he'll delegate to his dwarves. Maybe instead of bringing presents he'll take us all up to heaven! Fantastic. I hope his wounds have healed up by now. Probably, unless it required prayer.

I’m ok about Jesus coming down my chimney but if he appears in my bedroom singing, “ Jesus loves you this I know “, I will tell him, “ No thanks mate , go and find someone else to love,  you’ve buggered my life too much already, you’re not coming back in again.  No one gets to sneak in  my back passageway, fly away back to heaven “. Then I’ll wake up and realise it was only a queer dream but write it down as if it really happened because obviously dreams are made in heaven.
[actually it was quite dark so I didn't see him too well but I felt his presence ]

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