Thursday 17 July 2014

Why didn't Jesus visit the Americas before heading out into the Milky Way ?

If you imagined that Jesus had the ability to fly up in the sky like Acts 1v9 claims then isn't it odd that Jesus never landed in the Americas back in 33AD but instead left if for another 1500 years ish until the Europeans discovered the Americas and brought their Biblical nonsense with them. Jesus could have arranged for the drawing of plenty of Nazca lines showing cross symbols or the usual pictures which show the chosen ones crossing the cross bridge while the rest fry. For that matter why didn't Jesus visit Australia if he wanted his message to reach all nations ( Matt 28v19). He certainly wasn't in any hurry for everyone to know. ReWrit John 3v16. " For God so loved the world that instead of getting Jesus to stop off in the Americas to tell them the gospel of salvation he just left many generations to fry "

ReWrit Matt 24v36 " No-one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. And if there was no global Noah's flood then you can be fairly sure I won't be back either. But in any case if I'm not back in under 2000 years then give up, in that case you can be fairly sure I was mistaken about this and you won't be seeing me again. "

Parody on Rick Found's, " Lord I lift your name on high "

Lord, i'd like to question why
You never went on a world tour
So that everyone would know
How to interpret the way to go.

You came from heaven to Earth to show the way ?
but left the Americas for some other day ?
1500 years to be more exact
Until Europeans handed them a tract
A sense of urgency it seems you lacked !

Jesus there's a question I'd like to ask
why you didn't perform a simple task;
You never flew over to the U.S.A
But left your message for some other day ?

You came from heaven to Earth to show the way ?
maybe you asked for another cup: chocolate
Father said No: Tooth decay ?
If you suffered all that pain, was their really any gain ?
We've got reasons to complain

You came from heaven to Earth to show the way ?
But didn't even know to pray for milky tray
Father put chocolate on another continent
Out of sight out of mind
Christ, wasn't that unkind ?

You flew to heaven from Earth across the milky way ?
But didn't stop off in the Americas for a single day ?
You let them rot for 1500 years, 
now 2000 in the milky way
You should stop and ask the way.

Cariociones Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlL5or7I3q8

Parody on " 500 miles " by the Pretenders

My Parody of ' 500 miles '  wondering why Jesus never did a world tour:

When I'm incarnate, I know I'm not gonna be
I'm not gonna be the man who takes the gospel to all nations
When I go out, yeah I know I'm not gonna be
I'm not gonna be the man who walks over to you

When I ascend, I know I'm not gonna be
I'm not going to be the man who flies the gospel to America
when I ascend, I know  I'm not gonna be
I'm not gonna be the man who takes the gospel to Australia

Cause I won't walk 6000 miles
And I won't walk 10,000 more
to be the saviour who walks 25,000 miles
to drop my message through your door

Though I could calm the ocean storms
and walk upon the waters blue
I'm not gonna be the Son of God 
who uses his talents to bring the gospel there for you

When I go home, I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who leaves without telling you
And though 1500 years pass or 1800 for Australia
Still I'm not gonna even tell my disciples about you

Cause I won't walk 6000 miles
And I won't walk 10,000 more
to be the saviour who walks 25,000 miles
to drop my message through your door

and when you try them, when you try these miracles for yourself
you'll find they dinnae work, you'll find they dinnae work for you
Cause they are fiction, yes the Bible stories are mostly fiction
They are fairy tales made up to deceive you

2 comments:

  1. Jehovah's Witnesses can help you with many of your ideas. Contact your local Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses, or go to www.jw.org

    My name is josephine richardson. Contact me via facebook. My blog is at www.evolutioniswrong.org Your ideas reflect basic ignorance of the Bible. Jehovah's Witnesses offer free home Bible studies free of charge and at your convenience.

    ReplyDelete
  2. See, "Why evolution is true " by Jerry Coyne

    ReplyDelete